Making the Holidays Brighter: A Stroke Survivor’s Guide to Christmas
BY: ANDY K AND LIZ SHAW
The holiday season has always been a time of magic. The twinkling lights, the scent of pine needles, the sound of Christmas carols floating through the air—it’s a season that makes our hearts feel warm and our spirits light. For many of us, it’s also a time of reconnecting with loved ones, making memories, and reflecting on the year gone by. But for stroke survivors like myself, it’s also a time of mixed emotions. While the joy is undeniable, there’s often a quiet undercurrent of sadness and frustration. The holidays can be a reminder of the things we used to do effortlessly—and sometimes, the things we can no longer do at all.
As a stroke survivor, I’ve learned that the holidays can be both beautiful and challenging. On one hand, I cherish the time spent with family, the laughter shared around the dinner table, and the little moments that make life feel special. But on the other hand, there are times when I find myself longing for the things I used to do without a second thought—like decorating the tree, baking cookies, or preparing a big holiday feast for everyone. It’s those quiet moments of reflection that can catch you off guard.
A Personal Touch: Finding Joy in the Little Things
A few years ago, my dear friend John, also a stroke survivor, had a brilliant idea. Instead of tackling the entire house like he used to, he decided to focus just on the Christmas tree. And the best part? He invited his grandkids to join in. Watching their little faces light up as they hung the ornaments was a gift in itself. It wasn’t about making the house look perfect—it was about spending time together and creating memories. That’s what the holidays are really about: cherishing the moments, even if they don’t go exactly as planned.
And speaking of unexpected moments, let me tell you about a mishap I had just the other day. I was outside, minding my business, when—boom!—I slipped on some ice and landed with a not-so-graceful thud. The first thing I thought was, “Here we go again.” But instead of feeling frustrated, I couldn’t help but laugh. It felt like something from my childhood—silly, a little reckless, but oddly freeing. Sometimes, it’s these little moments, the ones you least expect, that bring the most joy. And those are the moments I try to hold on to.
New Hurdles, Same Hope: The Ongoing Journey of Stroke Recovery
It’s been four years since my stroke, and although I’ve made a lot of progress, there are days when it feels like I’m right back where I started. One of the biggest challenges I face now is the resurgence of some of my old symptoms, particularly in my affected leg. The pain has gotten more intense lately—there are days when it’s just a dull ache, but other times, it feels like an electric shock running through my leg for no apparent reason. It’s unpredictable, and it’s hard to plan around. Even simple things, like standing up or walking across the room, have become much harder.
I’ve also been dealing with drop foot since the beginning, and recently, that’s felt more noticeable too. It’s like my leg is just not responding the way it used to, and that’s been tough to come to terms with. There’s this constant feeling that my leg could give way at any moment, and the fear of falling is always in the back of my mind. It’s a bit of a reality check, reminding me that recovery isn’t a straight path.
What’s been hardest is the pain. Some days it’s a dull ache that’s manageable, and other days it feels like someone’s sending a shockwave through my leg, even when I’m just sitting still. The unpredictability of it makes it hard to feel in control. I’ve had to rethink how I sit, how I stand, and how I move. Tasks that were once second nature, like making a meal or getting out of bed, now require careful consideration of how I position myself. And though medication helps a bit, it’s far from a miracle cure. I’ve had to accept that my body isn’t always going to do what I want it to.
The hardest part of all, though, is the feeling that my leg isn’t as stable as it once was. There’s a noticeable weakness now that I didn’t feel before, and when I stand or walk, it’s like my leg is unsure of what it’s supposed to do. It’s unsettling. I find myself gripping the edge of the couch, a wall, or a chair just to steady myself. The thought of needing a cane again feels like I’m taking a step backward. I used one at the beginning, and honestly, it felt like I was admitting defeat. But over time, it gave me the stability I needed. I worked hard to walk without it, and every step without it felt like a victory. Now, though, I find myself asking if I’ll need to go back to using it. The thought of it makes me anxious. But if I fall because I choose not to use the cane, then I’ll deal with it. I’ll pick myself up, brush myself off, and keep going. It’s just another step in this journey.
I’ll be seeing my doctor soon to talk about these new challenges, but I’ve learned not to expect quick fixes. Healing takes time, and sometimes, it’s not linear. Some days I feel like I’ve made huge strides, and other days, it feels like I’m starting over. But that’s the thing about recovery—it’s messy. There’s no clear endpoint, no finish line. It’s about learning how to live with the new version of myself. And some days, that feels like enough.
It’s All About Progress, Not Perfection
There are days when the frustration of not being able to do things the way I used to gets to me. But then I remember: progress isn’t always about perfection. It’s about the little victories—the moments when I push through, even when everything feels harder than it used to. The important thing is that I’m moving forward, even if it’s just one step at a time.
I’d love to hear from you.
Whether it’s your thoughts, experiences, or advice, please don’t hesitate to reach out to me at admin@strokenewsletter.net. It’s been amazing to hear from so many of you on this journey. I truly believe that sharing our stories makes us stronger, and together, we can continue to grow and heal.
Tips for a Meaningful Holiday Season
Embrace Imperfection: Let go of the idea that everything has to be perfect. Focus on what truly matters: the love, laughter, and memories you create along the way.
Practice Self-Care: Take care of yourself during this busy season. Whether it’s curling up with a book, listening to your favorite holiday music, or spending time outside, make sure you’re doing something that brings you peace.
Set Realistic Expectations: Don’t overcommit yourself. Focus on a few things you can truly enjoy and let the rest go.
Connect with Others: Don’t be afraid to reach out—whether it’s family, friends, or support groups. Even a simple phone call can make a world of difference.
Seek Professional Help: If you’re feeling down or overwhelmed, please seek support. There’s no shame in asking for help—it’s part of the journey.
Thoughtful Gift Ideas for Stroke Survivors
Cozy Comforts: A soft blanket, a pair of warm slippers, or even a weighted blanket to help with relaxation and sleep.
Practical Helpers: Adaptive utensils, jar openers, or reacher grabbers to make everyday tasks a little easier.
Tech Savvy Gifts: Voice-activated devices, smart plugs, or video doorbells to add convenience and security.
Creative Outlets: Art supplies, coloring books, or sculpting clay to spark creativity and help you relax.
Health and Wellness: Resistance bands, yoga mats, or massage pillows to support your recovery and well-being.
Sweet Treats: Special holiday cookies, gourmet chocolates, or their favorite teas or coffees to bring some cheer.
Sentimental Gifts: Personalized photo albums or family calendars to remind them of the love and support that surrounds them.
Finding Joy in the Season
This Christmas, let’s remember that the best gifts aren’t the ones that come wrapped in shiny paper—they’re the moments of love, gratitude, and connection. Stroke survivors, celebrate your strength. Every step forward, no matter how small, is a victory.
For caregivers and loved ones, your support means everything. The presence of someone who understands, who is there with you through thick and thin, is the most precious gift.
And remember, it’s okay to feel a mix of emotions during the holidays. Be gentle with yourself. Practice self-care. Reach out for help when you need it. By focusing on the positive and embracing the spirit of the season, we can all find joy and peace, even during the toughest times.
From my heart to yours, I wish you a holiday season filled with warmth, love, and peace. Let’s spread joy and make this holiday season one to remember! Share your favorite traditions, memories, or even gift ideas with me at admin@strokenewsletter.net.
Here’s to a Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays! ✨
Please note that STROKENEWSLETTER.NET is operated by a stroke survivor and is not managed by a licensed medical professional. All stroke therapies and rehabilitation methods mentioned should only be performed under the supervision and guidance of a qualified healthcare provider. Always consult with your doctor or a certified medical professional before starting any new treatment or therapy regimen.